We were picked (our household) by the Office of National Statistics as one of the 130,000 "lucky" ones in the UK this year to be visited and have stupid questions asked about life, the universe and everything!! You can't refuse apparently!!
You wouldn't believe some of the questions - or maybe you would, if you know this government! Among all the usual stuff about education, work and health there were these four questions:
1) How happy are you on a scale of 1 to 10?
2) How satisfied are you with your life ….. ?
3) How happy were you yesterday ….?
4) How anxious were you yesterday…… ?
I HAVE NEVER, IN ALL MY BORN DAYS, HEARD ANYTHING SO @*£$%^ STUPID!!!! Austin said his thoughts on the matter were completely off the scale!
I told the government official chappy that I couldn't even remember what I had for breakfast let alone my emotional state yesterday and please could I get back to him after I had consulted my regression therapist? Austin was in tucks!!
Austin declined to answer any questions regarding his mental state, but when pressed, on the subject of education he revealed he had a Dogtorate in CataNOMics from the University of Catatonia.
However he conveniently forgot to mention the ASBO* he received from the local Magistrate (me) just the day before.
When the government official chappy left he seemed to have acquired a bit of a facial tic!
*ASBO = Anti-Social Behaviour Order
government/governmental - govern-mental - a form of collective mind control