I had to go to The Stabby Place yesterday. I had absolutely no warning about this. I woke up from my nap to see "Her" looming over me being all sweet and nice and coochy coo! Before you could say "nip sausage" I was
gently placed into the PTU and imprisoned for ten
minutes while she drove me to THAT place. Needless to say I sang the song of my people all the way there and even wrote a couple more verses for good measure!
When we arrived we had to wait for another ten
minutes and do you know what happened? I was still singing the refrain
for the umpteenth time
when the door opened and THE BIGGEST DOG IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD came in! I knew it was going to eat me there and then. You just know these things! "She" said "It's going to do no such thing." But I knew. I just knew! How did I know? You may well ask! Oh, you did! Well, it was licking its ginormous lips AND it was looking at me at the same time, proving what we already feared, that dogs CAN multitask! THE BIGGEST DOG IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD looked like this....
"She" said it's a Saint Bernard!!! I said no way was that thing a saint. Oh No! It was going to eat me. As far as I know saints don't eat kitties! Maybe someone can put me right on this? Anyways, it was a very narrow escape as THE BIGGEST DOG IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD was quickly taken into "The Back Room" and a short time later came out again wearing the BIGGEST cone of shame I'd ever seen. How I larfed! Now try and eat me, Bernie old chap!!
Then it was my turn in "The Back Room". "She" had to scruff me to come out of the PTU, but I didn't bite or scratch. I even allowed myself to be cuddled by the nurse for, like, forever. I am not an ignorant peasant. I know how to behave. I will gloss over the indignities administered to me, but enough to say that I was greatly discomforted!
minute journey home was substantially quieter. Once back I realised I needed some succour so sought out BIG Nippage (Nip Sausage. Geddit?) who has come to me courtesy of Mollie and Alfie's
shop and cuddled him a bit. "She", who has nothing better to do, has shamelessly videoed our private moment and turned it into a movie with music and everything! Ladycats might need to avert their eyes!
You can view on YouTube here
The Staff here. Austin has had his annual shot, but also as he has had problems with feline stomatitis, I have to take him regularly to be checked. A while a go the vet did a procedure using cryo freezing (tautological!) to remove the lesions and was quite successful, meaning his teeth have been ok. This time he could see signs that it might be returning, so will have to go back in a couple of months to check again. He might have to have another procedure! :( Happily his teeth are still fine and he does not seem to be in any discomfort. I am watching him like a hawk!
Bigamist - comparative adjective, e.g. today's mist was greater than the one yesterday