Thursday, 21 August 2008

Lap Cat!

Austin, my little spiky feline friend, has discovered laps! He's always been friendly, well, except when he's got a project on, like fly catching or curtain climbing. He's never liked being picked up and still doesn't, except when his curiosity overcomes his fear of confinement. However, just lately he's found that he can get a very comfortable few minutes kip by burrowing his way into my lap. I suppose, if I were to be honest, my lap is to him what an overstuffed armchair is to me! What happens is this:

He scratches at the door

I open it

He marches in with purpose written all over his face and gives me the perky big-eyed piercing look which impales me to the back of the chair - even though I was on my way out to the shops at the time.

I cower, terrified

He jumps up on lap

I recline

He turns round exactly seven times and sticks his claws in to check for leaks.

I leak red stuff

He burrows head in my hand

I stroke his ears

He applies his acupuncture technique - well you can forget the "acu" bit, he goes straight to "puncture"!

Eventually head lolls - mine

He sleeps

I snore

He dreams

I twitch

He jumps

I groan

He stretches

I yawn

He gets up

I cringe

He then, very kindly, starts to give both of us an all over body wash. Although I suspect his apparent concern for my personal hygiene is incidental rather than deliberate.

Update on Bodgit and Scarper Enterprises

Well they come and look in the hole from time to time and even bring their mates along for a confab. I reckon they think they've hit a sewage pipe because of the cats using it as a toilet. Who's going to enlighten them? They themselves also use the hole as an ashtray - a multipurpose hole, eh!

Memo: Must write to council about smoking in the workplace.

Oh and they also came and put up scaffolding last Wednesday and returned the next day to take it down again.

Note to self. Must make sure I know where Austin is when they finally fill hole in again!


  1. I bet Bogit will be missing after Scarper fills the hole in, seriously, these guys are rediculous.... ever though of asking Jonny to come and do it all while their "'avin' a fag"?

    Lol's and luvs,


  2. There's a girder sticking out from the front of the house now!! I'm having to forcibly restrain Austin from swinging on it.

    Apparently they are waiting for a delivery!!! Of what, I don't know! Probably some new mud to put in hole.

    Get Jonny down here soon as :>)


  3. Lolled and Roffled as usual!


    I shall come to inspect tomorrow.

    Luv Bruv

  4. Lols, mayhaps they're waiting for a new delivery of tea to come from china by mule.....

    That would explain a lot.

  5. lol must be taking the long way round :>)

    as you saw, hole now has a pole growing out of it. Must be the manure! Anyway we've had Bentleys and BMWs inspecting it all weekend - oh and Mazdas ;> so must be something earth shattering about to take place. Expecting Mick with his pick tomorrow!

  6. Lets hope mick the pick (and his brother mack the knife....sorry) realise it's the pole they're checking... not the Bentley >.<

  7. Bentley's gone, hole's still there!!!!! No Mick, no pick. 8>


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