Tuesday, 3 March 2015

Comrades!

It appears we have tapped into a rich seam with the launch of NUCAT! 


It has been suggested by Comrade Savannah that this already global movement should convene a planning conference! Comrade Cody and Comrade Katie Isabella and many others are proclaiming it from the rooftops! We are a movement for change and for ........... thumbs!! Yep, that's right, thumbs! Today is "If pets (cats) had thumbs" day. Not just thumbs, because many cats do have thumbs, but OPPOSABLE thumbs! Which brings me on to the very first grievance to put before the (miss)management ......

This grievance was raised by Comrade Annie Bear. In her own words .. "how about not enough treats (once a day is not enough!)......."

Yes it is about treats! First of all, I submit the name should be changed. "Treat" indicates something rarely given as an indulgence or an extravagance or luxury! How can something that gives so much pleasurable nomminess to 99% of all cats be an indulgence? Second of all, unless you are a Waffles with teeth like Jaws from the Bond films the treat pack is always out of reach behind closed and padlocked doors which we can't open because WE DON'T HAVE OPPOSABLE THUMBS!

So our first submission is "The treat shall no longer be called a treat, but receive a new name and become established and accepted as a vital food group for the health and wellbeing of cats! Therefore, the erstwhile treat (new name to be decided) shall be placed in a cat accessible location at all times in a container with a flip-top lid which is easily flicked with a thumbless paw!"

Our second submission is "that the case for opposable thumbs be sent to the highest authority toot sweet so that plans for world domination can proceed unhindered!"

What do you think Comrades? Is this doable? Will the (miss)management be taken in amenable? Will we need arbitration? Has The Staff completely lost her marbles? (the last is without doubt true!)

Remember, we are demoCATic and all comments and suggestions will be given due consideration. So, we have to be .........

consistently
persistent and
insistent that the
assistant is not
resistant or
distant and that the treats (new name pending) are
existent at all times!

Simplez :))

Meanwhile  .......
It's been a long day!
The Blankie is calling!

NB All grievances from members can be submitted so the committee i.e. all cat members (NOT Affiliates) and will be considered for (in)action in due course ;)

Next time we will have to think about appointing a minutes secretary

Thank you for your attention

The meeting is hereby adjourned

=^oo^= 


minute(s) secretary - a very small assistant .....

=^oo^=

Sunday, 1 March 2015

Further NUCAT news and Sunday Selfie!

Further to the launch yesterday of NUCAT - the National Union of Cats and without Affiliate Typists - I wish to thank everyone who has signed up as charter members and taken the oath of allegiance (whatever!) and who is proudly displaying the badge. 


Also I am opening up an office in Catatonia so that all those with grievances can have them addressed with maximum ennui and lassitude.

Here I am doing my best ennui and lassitude

So, please feel free to send me detailed expositions of your concerns and together we will decide how to overcome the tyranny of the Affiliates, who, just because they have opposable thumbs does not mean they should run the universe. 

Look at it from our point of view! They sleep roughly eight hours in twenty-four. We, on the other paw, sleep at least twenty. Who has the most wars? Do the math!  

Be a cat.
Peace out and nap!

We are joining Kitties Blue Sunday Selfies blog hop. Click on the badge below to see other participating blogs :)



=^oo^=


ennui and lassitude - definition pending.....

=^oo^=

Saturday, 28 February 2015

Some words from The Blankie!



Hello everybuddy! I am speaking to you today from The Blankie as I have something very impawtant to announce!

Because of the huge positive response to my post the other day about a union for cats, I am today launching the National Union of Cats and without Affiliate Typists. You can see below the large (and colourful) poster describing a little of what we stand for; and, let's be honest, we stand for little! If the ideals and objectives resonate with you, please feel free to sign up and take the badge below. There are two different sizes. There is no official membership, no rules, and there will never be any meetings or strikes or picket lines.

This movement has evolved over many years of enduring suffering at the hands of inefficient and, quite frankly, insubordinate and obdurate humans. Now if I could work out what those words mean, I could run for high office (on top the cabinet?!!!) legislating for 24/7 napping rights, getting Class A nip legalised and tuna treats become the only acceptable food group.

Come one, come all! Sign up today and you will receive absolutely nothing zilch nada not-a-dicky-bird except the sure knowledge that IT IS JUST A MATTER OF TIME before the yakked hairball will become the subject of a preservation order and thus saved in perpetuity.

Thank you for listening




Today we are joining Athena and Marie's Caturday Art blog hop. Click on their badge below to check out the other blogs participating.


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in perpetuity - I think it means to have a pet forever!

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Sunday, 22 February 2015

It snow good!

What's going on?
It appears to be snowing!!!!
Indoors?

EXCUSE ME!!!!???

Will you wipe the screen, please?
Thank you!
That's better.
Now you can see me!

The Staff obviously as nothing better to do than play around with PicMonkey making me look ridiculous when I've settled comfortably in my compact and bijou fleecy bed under the cane chair in the conservatory! 

(We are sending warm good wishes and paw hugs to all our American blogging friends who are suffering big time mega snowfalls!)

You get a two for one deal today as we are entering both Athena and Marie's Caturday Art AND Kitties Blue Sunday Selfie. Just click on the badges below to join the throng :)



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conservatory - (also preserve-a-tory) (Brit.) a command; possibly in aspic!

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Wednesday, 18 February 2015

NUCAT?


If I look all cute and coy
Will you get me a new toy?
I'm a bit fed up with the ones I've got
As they are kicked around a lot.

They've lost all "oomph" and have no nip
I might as well go on a trip.
You do not care about my play,
And all you do is waste the day.

You clickity clack on that keyboard
Sometimes I think you are a fraud.
You write pretending to be me,
But we all know the truth, you see.

Cats can't type - this is a shock!
But in order to beat writer's block
You look to me for inspiration,
And I end up giving you dictation.

I don't want to waste all my time,
Making words go into rhyme.
All I want is my nip nanner
Then I'll cease all the clamour!  

The time has come for cats to show
That we should not go with the flow.
We'll gather as one to tell the human,
That we are starting a CAT'S UNION!

We'll call it the N.U.C.A.T.
And all can join voluntarily.
All for one and one for all,
Let's fight the fight and stand up tall.

When we have won and proved our case,
We'll show munificence and grace,
Allowing the peeps to have the last word,
But not before they've fixed DaBird!

=^oo^=


N.U.C.A.T - National Union of Cats and Affiliate Typists

=^oo^=

Monday, 16 February 2015

Sunday, 15 February 2015

Peel me a prawn!

It's a cat's life!
I am Austinius Caesar and I am the ruler of all I survey - and pretty much everywhere else too, except when I am shamefully usurped from my sumptuous repast by a stripy monster! 

Et two, Brute? Which roughly translated means "Tigger, get your greedy mitts out of my filet mignon with goat cheese and prawns! You've already partaken of two, you nasty kitty you!!" Boom Boom!!!! Geddit?!! I astound myself sometimes! ;-)


The pest post prandial Tiggerus Fattus 

It's the Sunday Selfie bloghop today with Kitties Blue. Check out what's going on by clicking the badge below


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post prandial - the time immediately after Tigger eats my dinner and usually involves thwacky paw
usurped - rhymes with burped. Nuff sed!
repast - deja vu

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