Boxing Day

There is something wrong with this picture!

Hmmmph!!!

Arraghuph!!!

Ah! That's better. The status has returned to quo.
Alien Eyes triumphs again!

A CATachresis Christmas

Here at CATachresis we have been very busy getting ready for Christmas and to that end Austin and I have worked together as a team to bring you our Christmas card.  ♪Dadaaahhhh♪ .......  


Errr as you can see, it wasn't the smoothest of photo shoots!

Austin, if I could just ask you to ....

 ....look at the camera!

 ...not the wire please!

 Yes it smells lovely!

 that's a bauble thingy!

 Ahem!

 "Who's that outside?"

 Look! Martin's doing his bit!

Uh Uh!

*sigh*

"Really bored now!!!!"

Ok, here we go ....

I think this is the best we can do under the circumstances!

We would like to wish all our lovely friends and readers

A VERY HAPPY CHRISTMAS

and a peaceful and healthy New Year!

PS For those who have not seen it, here is the video we made for Christmas about three years ago, and as only about 2½ people saw it, it's probably worth another showing :)

The Prodigal Tigger!

He's back! Calm as you like he wandered in after about three weeks AWOL! Absolutely nothing's changed, except his girth is seriously in need of an industrial strength corset!

"Thought I drop by for a bite of lunch"

 

"Wossat?"

"Oh hi Austin"

(Austin is delighted to see Tigger!!!!)

"Anyone else at home?"

"Come on mate, I haven't been gone that long. How about a wrestle for old times!"

"Oh well, if you're going to be like that…."

"…I hear Big Ginge is having chicken fajitas with home-made guacamole and salsa today." 

"To be honest your 

Felix-Senior-for-cats-7+years-fish-selection-in-jelly 

doesn't do it for me!"

So there you have it. Tigger is back and all is well with the world. I do believe he must have heard the collective call of the international cat bloggers nag-athon and just gave in to the inevitable. Austin and I thank you :)

"It weren't me, guv. Honest!"

What's a chap to do if something that smells so yummy 

"accidentally" falls to the floor?

First you sniff it…...

 .... then you roll in it…..

 …. then just as you're going in for the kill,

a two-legged furless miseryguts takes it away ….

… so you sulk big time… 

…. and the two-legged furless miseryguts relents ...

  

…and puts the end that's been pre-chewed in your dish!

RESULT!

Haiku at Christmas

Cat sits patiently

with some holly on his head.

Such indignity!

This is Austin preparing for the festive fun.
As you can see, he is from the "Bah Humbug" school of Christmas cheer!

By the way we haven't seen Tigger for at least two weeks now and are getting quite concerned. For those who are not up to speed, Tigger is Austin's buddy and you can read about him on the "Meet the Gang" page. It's true we often don't see him at the house for several days, but it's never been this long! So we are wondering if he's moved away, or maybe (hopefully) his staff have just gone on holiday and have temporarily incarcerated him in a cattery or something!

Tigger, come back soon. We miss you :(

Austin is quite lonely. He's got no one to fight with, 
except Big Ginge from down the road and this beleaguered human!

A Senior Moment!

 What do we have here?

I know it's MY lunch as my brother Felix was the poser for the pic

so we have to support him.

Boy is he ever a poser. I'm sure he's been airbrushed. That smile

ain't natural!

But what does it say here?

Senior? 7+ years?

Excuse me!

 Sorry Austin, It's my new specs. 
I suppose you won't believe it if I say it's because
you're very mature for your age?

Give me strength!

She'll have me in the old cat's home with all my teeth out 
sucking on kibble before I'm 5 at this rate! 

That Awkward Moment ..........

..... when I call Austin to come for no good reason, or he thinks I've called him to come and I haven't and as he tends to come when called, he comes. And all I've been doing is whistling to myself and sucking my teeth. 


To explain. If you spend most nights hissing "Austin" outside the back door like I do, it does sound like you're trying to whistle through the gap between your two top central incisors. As the subconscious sibilant simulation is  quite therapeutic, I can catch Austin out on occasion just by whistling and sucking teeth in an inappropriate manner!


Anyway, he rushes up and says "Wot?" and I say "Oh, nothing!" Then of course we both feel a bit stupid and spend some time hurrumphing and clearing throats and not catching each other's eye. It's a bit embarrassing to say the least!